1.0Amber Bird | Bloghttps://www.amberbird.com/blogamberhttps://www.amberbird.com/blog/author/admin/rich600338<blockquote class="wp-embedded-content" data-secret="oPQArMzVAJ"><a href="https://www.amberbird.com/blog/2015/12/13/not-ashamed-celibate/">Not Ashamed: Celibate</a></blockquote><iframe sandbox="allow-scripts" security="restricted" src="https://www.amberbird.com/blog/2015/12/13/not-ashamed-celibate/embed/#?secret=oPQArMzVAJ" width="600" height="338" title="“Not Ashamed: Celibate” — Amber Bird | Blog" data-secret="oPQArMzVAJ" frameborder="0" marginwidth="0" marginheight="0" scrolling="no" class="wp-embedded-content"></iframe><script> /*! This file is auto-generated */ !function(d,l){"use strict";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&"undefined"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!/[^a-zA-Z0-9]/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret="'+t.secret+'"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret="'+t.secret+'"]'),c=new RegExp("^https?:$","i"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display="none";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute("style"),"height"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):"link"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute("src")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener("message",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener("DOMContentLoaded",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll("iframe.wp-embedded-content"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute("data-secret"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+="#?secret="+t,e.setAttribute("data-secret",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:"ready",secret:t},"*")},!1)))}(window,document); //# sourceURL=https://www.amberbird.com/blog/wp-includes/js/wp-embed.min.js </script> If you haven’t already, please read the introduction post. That will give you context for this page. As my awareness of issues around consent and rape culture grows, my thoughts about being shamed for celibacy have gotten less patient. A lot of what’s in here is also relevant to all the people who seem to feel, often just because they think I’m pretty, that I should hook up with them. Whilst most people have written off my celibacy (or rejection of their come-ons) as an artefact of my religion, it’s much more complicated than that. However, I no longer feel like explaining myself to anyone. For reasons related to my first paragraph. Previously, my response to people’s unhappiness and shaming around my celibacy (or rejection of their advances) has been rooted in disappointment (at their actions and words towards me) and patience. Patiently keeping my mouth shut as they tried to make me feel bad. Patiently deflecting their advances, over and over and over, as they refused to accept my “no.” Laughing along with threats, usually in jest, to just dose me and take advantage of me anyway. And so forth. But let me make this clear, now that I […]https://www.amberbird.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2021/08/AmberBird_fromPF_portraitSQ.jpg13241324